When my brother was in his twenties and a couple of years into marriage, he explained to me his theory about the cleanliness threshold. He drew out a chart where he illustrated the state of the household mess and that when it increased, it hit his wife’s threshold for a messy house long before it … More Navigating the Gray Area
When American actor James Caan died in July of this year, I heard that his least favorite words were “I don’t care.” Obviously, I can’t ask him to elaborate on that. But if I’m trying to take his point, I’m guessing he was aiming for “I don’t care” – as in, it is of no … More Caring Less Without Being Careless
The other day a friend was telling me how his dad, who was a professor in the business school at the University of Washington, wrote books. He’d shut himself in his home office and for two months would just sit there with a note pad nearby. Sometimes he’d watch a game or organize stacks of … More When I Write
The other day I made a comment off-handedly and the recipient said, “Oh, that’s so nice.” I didn’t like that compliment. Yes, I realize it’s not nice of me to judge a comment about being nice. Upon reflection, it’s because I don’t like the sound of me when I’m doing nice. And believe me, as … More Don’t Call Me Nice…Please
A couple of weeks ago, I took both my kids to the doctor’s office. When it came time for the flu shots, the tech asked me to pick which child should go first. I picked my 3-year-old son. He reacted with an “ouch” and then was on to the next thing. My 7-year-old daughter went … More Do You Listen To Your Pain?
My 6-year-old daughter came home from school the other day and said she had a bad day. She explained saying that a kid on the playground was comparing her. Not understanding, I asked her to say more. She relayed that he was saying, “I can do the monkey bars faster. I can go longer. I … More Comparing Our Differences
There are many things I do not know. Like what it takes to make a light switch work; or how many species of bird reside in my home state. I do not know advanced mathematic formulas; I do not know why the daffodils come back each spring. I’m just one person, with a single, yet … More SnapDragon Speaks: On Knowing.
I have a real thing about utility. When I lived in the city, and spent all my time at my boyfriend’s apartment, it bothered me that my own four walls just sat there, waiting. No one home. Cups and cookbooks, sweaters and bags of loose-leaf tea just sitting still, perhaps wishing for a sign of … More SnapDragon Speaks: On The Used.
To All The Friends I’ve Lost: I simply want to say hello, although it’s been so many years. Because even as time performs its cruel, relentless dance, I still remember you. I remember us. I still laugh when I think of all our ridiculous jokes; how many fears, dreams and secrets we shared; how many … More SnapDragon Speaks: To All The Friends I’ve Lost.
I think there is great beauty in the space between: The space between sleep. The space between our brown-bagged lunches. The space between radio commercials. Life. It clicks by: In the flashes of headlights. The clanking of spoons. The aching of hands and feet. And no matter how hard we try, there is never enough … More SnapDragon Speaks: On The Space Between.
What is with us humans? Why do we have a tendency to trivialize other people’s problems, but when they happen to us, it’s the end of the effing world? We compartmentalize for our friends: Hey, at least you don’t have to worry about: the political nature of Academia; gas prices; sibling rivalry; no buffer zone; … More SnapDragon Speaks: On The Unwritten Page.
If I could start all over again, I’d only focus on my body being strong. The hell with the numbers. If I could start all over again, I’d go into meetings with confidence. I have a right to be here. If I could start all over again, I’d make more time for reading. For crafting. … More SnapDragon Speaks: On Starting Over.
I interrupt your regularly-scheduled blog reading to say: SnapDragon is not okay. Well, wait. That’s an exaggeration. I’m all right. I guess what I mean is: I get scared. I get overwhelmed. I get burned out. Don’t get me wrong. All things considered, I live a very privileged life. Security. Love. Comfort. Creativity. But that … More SnapDragon Speaks: On The Mess.
Yesterday I ate a piece of chocolate. Just a single square, wrapped in a golden foil. It had been chilled in the fridge. I like sweets this way. The cold and creamy sweetness danced on my taste buds. I savored it. For it was just another fleeting moment in time. . . . SnapDragon is … More SnapDragon Speaks: On The Moment.
Like an elusive vapor, my reflection floats, then gently fades before my eyes. Like a favorite novel, its binding and its pages warp with the inevitable passing of time. Yet its story–its spirit–stays the same. . . . When I look in the mirror I see a woman on the cusp of her 34th year. … More SnapDragon Speaks: On The Mirror.
(sighs) Life. Sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose. But there is beauty in the struggle, my friend. My greatest fear in life is to be misunderstood. I know, I know. Kiiind of wishful thinking on my part. Because really: who hasn’t been misunderstood at least once in her life? In fact, who hasn’t experienced … More SnapDragon Speaks: On Being Vulnerable.
Why do we get jealous? It’s inevitable, really. Because for a time, in one way or another, we all feel it. She’s so much skinnier than me. *pout* He has a summer house he never even uses. *scowl* They pop out a kid every other year. *eye roll* Why, Dear Reader, can’t we simply be … More SnapDragon Speaks: On Jealousy.
Greetings, friends! As you may know, I took a short break from the blogosphere for much of September. Shit happened (as it does) and I needed to turn off and unplug as much as I could, for the sake of my weary mind. But I’m back, baby! So this first dive back into the pool … More SnapDragon Speaks: On Self-Love.