A Quick Update
It’s been a hectic time in my life. As some of you know, I got offered a job in and out of Fiji.
In preparation for this job, I spent the last few months reminding myself how to fly an aeroplane. That included returning to Hong Kong for a simulator check to renew my license.
What was the result of all this hard work? Well, I turned down the Fiji job. Which is anticlimactic given everything I’ve sacrificed.
However, the 2 weeks in Hong Kong gave my wife and I a glimpse of what life would be like with me away for nearly 3 weeks every month. As my wife said, “I don’t believe it’s in the best interest of our marriage or our family.”
Happily, there’s been ANOTHER opportunity. This is for a job based out of Singapore. I was contacted shortly before I went out to Hong Kong.
So, at the same time as everything else, I’ve been busy working towards that. I’m happy to report that I just got offered that job. I start next year.
In the meantime, I plan to enjoy a well-earned break over Christmas.
The Honest Truth
Anyway, it’s for all of the above that blogging has found itself at the bottom of the pile. In fact, it hasn’t even been part of the pile.
I told myself to shelve it – to get my priorities straight first. To do what my family needs, not only what I want.
Can I be brutally honest with you? I haven’t missed it very much. For a while, I had no desire to return to my writing ways.
That has been odd. Previously, I’ve felt a strong urge to return whenever I’ve taken a break. I’ve also felt more peaceful than I have in a long while.
The question is, why? Why haven’t I missed something I claim to love so much? Why has my absence from blogging corresponded with an increase in contentment? Is it not meant to be? Am I meant for a different path?
I often go through these cycles. It will start with a strong burst of enthusiasm. The proverbial apple will fall on my head, and I’ll write prolifically.
I’ll enjoy it, of course. But then it will take over. I can’t switch it off. I start to get overwhelmed by my own thoughts. I become increasingly distracted.
I’ll be playing with my kids – trying to give them some undivided attention (AKA love) – when an idea comes to mind. I’ll then tell them to “give me a minute” while I jot it down.
If my children had a dollar for every minute they’ve given me… They would be millionaires on paper but impoverished where it matters.
This is what happens. I end up pushing everything else to the side. Eventually, slowly, I find myself drowning under the weight of my untended responsibilities.
And what does this do for my writing? Because I say the write things, but I don’t act that way. I don’t put my money where my mouth is.
That strips the very meaning from those words. The so-called advice I give to others about getting their shit together. When the truth is, I’ve been falling woefully short myself.
This, eventually, causes me to lose motivation.
What I’ve Learnt
I realise talk is cheap. It’s easy to sit down and say the right thing. It’s far more challenging to act that way in real life. If talk is cheap, action is expensive.
Ultimately, integrity is about the alignment of both. My alignment has been off.
Part of the reason is because I’ve placed writing at the top of the pile. I’ve told myself that word proceeds with action. This is the big revelation from my time away. I’ve had it the wrong way around.
I’ll never stop writing. I do love it. When I take a break, I always come back. But only after I’ve taken care of the things I need and should. Only once I’ve cleared my conscience.
When that happens, the words hold far greater meaning – far greater weight. That’s because those words are backing up the actions I’ve already taken.
People tend to talk in terms of backing up their words with action. But what if we did the opposite? What if we all took an action-first approach? What if we held off from saying the right thing until we actually do it for ourselves?
For me, writing works well at the bottom of the pile. I’m ok with that, provided it’s not discarded entirely.
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Psst! I wrote a free ebook called Unlocking Personality. Feel free to check out if you want to learn more about who you are and what to do about it.
Welcome Back!! I have missed you. I completely understand the need to take a break and just refocus. Life is forever evolving. Please take breaks as needed, but also check in from time to time to let us know you are okay. Wishing you and your family many blessings. And congratulations on your new job!! Please take care of yourself! Shaun
Thank you Shaun. I’ll always keep checking in and writing. Just needed to put it in the back burner for a while. Hope you are doing well! 😊🙏
Love the honesty and relatability in this post AP2! You do what works for you and your family and that’s top priority. Congrats on the new, NEW job as well. It will be great if you pop in every so often with updates but ultimately only you know what works best.
Thank you Deb. I mean to keep writing. It’s just a period in my life where I needed to put it in the back burner for a while. Wishing you well. 🙏😊
We’ll done AP2. Family and personal needs come first. The rest is just a distraction.
Thanks Kevin. Ruthless prioritisation. The other stuff takes care of itself. Wishing you well 🙏
It sounds like the story of my summer😊 Life is throwing us in different directions sometimes, and priorities changes, but you know what? Sometimes we need a vacation, from work, from our daily chores, or even from writing. Just be who you are, and be with your loved ones!
Congrats on your new job!!
Christie
Thank you Christie. Well said. Wishing you well 🙏
I agree that your priorities of family come first.
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I love this! It given me a perspective I need to apply to other areas of my life.
Glad it helped 🙏
I took a break too and I didn’t miss it. But writing again, just a little bit, reminded me why I enjoy it.
It’s funny. The same thing. As I started writing I realised why I love to so much. I just need to find the right balance. Thank you 🙏
Welcome back congratulations on the new job!
I feel like right now I’m experiencing kind of the opposite of where you’ve been for the last few months: I have probably written more on the last four months than I did in the previous four years. And I’ve really started to discover the way that the creative juices can get flowing, and one idea can completely spring out something completely different. Fortunately, my job has been one that has allowed me the extra time to work as I am teaching online. That changes for me and January when I will be teaching some direct, face-to-face instruction classes again.
You mentioned in your post of the idea about “words leading to action“ and I do think that’s true to a point. I found myself more motivated to do my regular day today activities because I have been writing again. But I absolutely agree that it is about striking a balance between your words and your actions.
Do what you need to do to get yourself back in proper alignment. We’ll be here.
Thank you Rob. I think it’s a bit of both. Have your words if they lead to the right actions and vice versa. Provided they are in sync that’s what matters as opposed to which should come first. I guess it’s another chicken and egg type question. Wishing you well 🙏
Only you know what is and isn’t a priority. Glad you’re finding your life balance.
It’s a constant battle to find that balance. Always recalibrating. Like walking a tight rope! Go to slow or too fast and you’ll fall off. Wishing you well 🙏
Welcome back and congratulations on the new job! Priorities shift constantly and we all have to find a groove that works for us. I know you’ll find yours.
Thank you Michelle. 😊🙏
Congratulations on your new job! Follow your gut! You owe no one to write, so if your spirit is happier not writing, then follow that! You may yet return to write, and until then, blessings to you!
Thank you Tamara. I just need to find the right balance. So I can enjoy it without it feeling like an extra chore or something I have to do. Wishing you well too 🙏
Hi…so relate to you..have taken a hiatus from writing owing to my health and haven’t missed it!!
Thank you for sharing 🙏
You make me feel so much better about my own on-again off-again writing binges. Inspiration and motivation come and go; my challenge is not fall into the guilt trap during the go cycle. Your honesty helps!
It might guilt tripping myself whenever I stop writing that caused me to not miss it. Glad my honesty helped. Thank you for sharing yours Julia 🙏
how interesting. sounds like a revelation!
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Congratulations on the new job! I have a similar situation with playing trumpet. I claim to love it, and I really do, but when things shut down over Covid, I didn’t open my case in about seven months and I didn’t miss it at all. Eventually started playing again because I had gigs. And that “ forced playing” reminded me that I really do enjoy it, and I started to play again on my own.
Same thing with my writing. Only when I sat down after a while and put pen to paper did I remember what I loved about doing so. Thanks Todd. Hope you are well 🙏
Congrats on the new job, but even more, I applaud you bypassing a job that would’ve been difficult on your marriage. That’s huge!! As for the writing, I think these things tend to sort themselves out.
Thank you David. In the end it wasn’t a difficult decision. Family trumps career. Wishing you well 🙏
Congrats on the new job David! You don’t miss writing but I miss reading you!
Ah thanks Cristiana – these kind of comments make it miss it more! Hope you are doing well 🙂🙏