What is really important to you?

The Ego and The World
Drawing by Adrian Serghie

   I know you’ll probably say that your family and things like that, but think about your daily life. How much time per day do you spend getting mad about a sh*tty cashier or some crazy stupid drivers or some rude co-worker compared to how much time per day do you feel your love for your family? When some random person makes you mad, does that love for your family and friends help you?

   Ok, it might sound a little strange, but when some strangers have the power to change your mood however they want, they might be more important for you than they should. And this is probably related to some core beliefs you have and when those strangers say something that interfere with them, the amygdala fires up and your emotions are all over the place.

   The thing is that there are so many things that can influence our mood and when that happens, we tend to forget about the most important things we have in life. We tend to forget what’s important just because something or someone steals a moment of our life. We tend to spend countless minutes analyzing seconds. And the problem is not the countless minutes, the problem is that we get to the wrong conclusion and we don’t actually realize that the core beliefs are the problem, not the people or the situations.

   Thinking about this, how often do you let other people or situations control your emotions?

39 thoughts on “What is really important to you?

  1. Having peace is extremely important to me. I don’t want others to be able to interrupt my peace with their attitude or negative energy. I try to obtain this by remaining humble and not taking this personally.

  2. great question and important topic. i let people get me upset way more than i should, i know i shouldn’t give strangers such power and i work hard at keeping it together and send love! great topic!

      1. generally I go away & reflect on things. Time & distance, putting things into perspective I suppose.

  3. Why should I let them? If you let others control your feelings you are not yourself. Never react, always respond that is my number one rule. And to other side, when someone is upset with me I am not reacting because this is not my business. When you learn to do this automatically it’s amazing! 🌺🌺🌺 Love your posts

      1. When you think clearly about the situation, and decide what is right to do. Also I never get triggered too fast. First I have my perspective of whole thing and react according to that.

  4. U can change others but only urself. Professional life is so stressful but I keep emotions away. Recently my personal life was destroyed due to emotions so I just pray, watch TV, and enjoy nature.

  5. I liked this so much! It’s totally true. We often give so much power to stupid daily stuff instead of focusing on the really important things and persons. We should develop a universal way to avoid this as much as we can!

    1. I think this is related to the inner dialogue. As long as we counter those stupid thoughts and reactions and we switch that energy towards what’s important, I think we can diminish the influence of not-so-important things…

  6. Thanks, Bogdan, for this piece. Over the years, I’ve noticed something interesting about myself. When things get really chaotic and seem to be going to shit, i have this weird ability to get really calm and Zen about all the chaos that’s swirling around. I think this ability began when I was living in Egypt and we had the 2011 Revolution. (Remember the “Arab Spring”?) The whole society was coming apart and yet I really stayed mostly very calm. I was so pleased to discover this about myself and now I try to cultivate this part of my personality every chance I get.

    1. This is awesome! It seems that you have the same ability Gary Vaynerchuk talks about: the ability to become comfortable in massive chaos! I’m sure this superpower suites you well. Thank you for reading and for sharing this experience!

  7. This!!

    One thing I got from my time at a templestay is to not let your emotions carry you astray. You are always you. Your emotions are your emotions. They are NOT you. In a heated moment, it is good to take a step back and see yourself as separate from your emotions. Question: what is causing my emotions to behave this way? I am not this way. How should I behave then?

  8. There are so many positives in life, I try not to let the small negatives with strangers affect my mood and become time sucks.

    I think part of this is life experiences. You reach a point where the negative just isn’t worth it. My grandmother always said “you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” Don’t give them the vinegar – maybe our positive/less negative reaction is just what they need. We never know what the other people are going through.

  9. Preach! Taking control of our thought life and choosing rejoice despite circumstances is the key to a fruitful and healthy life.

  10. it is so relatable. It just reminds me of my dad whenever he came home after a long day, a tough one at work with the sad face and he was easily to be mad and lose his temper with everything happened in the quality time with our family. I and my mom just never knew where all the storm came from

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