A couple of weeks ago, I read two posts providing very distinct insights on generational differences. This led me to consider how the assumptions we make can get in the way of the intergenerational cooperation that could benefit us all.
The first post was from Pete Springer who shared a story of a lovely friendship with an older lady he met while volunteering in a seniors’ home. It was a reminder that friendship can be found in the most unexpected places—if we open our minds and hearts to it.
The second piece from Esoterica at Existential Ergonomics shared experiences from a recent trip that reinforced all the negative things younger people think about boomers. Reading it made me—and several others based on the comments—embarrassed to admit I’m a boomer.
Busting the Stereotypes
We’ve all heard the saying, “Never judge a book by its cover”. Yet we all do it. Sometimes it’s blatant and intentional. Other times, it’s unconscious bias—something we need to work to recognize.
Let’s look at some of the pervasive stereotypes, and then discuss how we can foster a spirit of intergenerational cooperation.
How the Young View Older People
As a boomer, I’m very aware of the mess my generation has made of the world and the legacy we’re leaving our children and grandchildren. Dubbed the “me generation” for a reason, boomers invented rampant consumerism and, as Esoterica pointed out in her post, many have a selfish “I’ll be dead by then, so it’s not my problem” mentality.
In an earlier post about ageism, I addressed some of the negative stereotypes of older adults, but let’s take a closer look at some of them.
They Can’t Use Technology
Boomers have had to adapt to a lot of technological change in their working lives. They’ve seen typewriters replaced with PCs, switchboard operators replaced with desktop phones and voicemail, and robots take over assembly lines. They weren’t born with a smartphone in their hands, but any boomer who is employed today has seen technology change everything about their jobs.
They are Too Old to Learn New Things
Younger people talk about older workers like they are washed up has-beens. With people living longer lives, it’s time to put this myth to rest. History is filled with significant accomplishments by people past what’s now considered to be the traditional retirement age. Laura Ingalls Wilder, author of the Little House books was 64 when she published her first book. John Glenn spent 11 days in space at age 77. And let’s not forget Captain Sir Tom Moore who raised millions for Britain’s National Health Service in the run up to his 100th birthday.
They Don’t Care About the Environment
Boomers do need to accept a lot of responsibility for the state of the environment. But, to generalize and say none of us care about the environment is just wrong. What gets me is when people, young or old, complain about the state of the planet while sporting their latest fast fashion purchases, and sipping their favourite beverage out of a disposable cup.
They Have Had It Easy Financially
It’s tough for young people today to get ahead. Housing prices are out of control and affordable rental accommodation is hard to find. But it hasn’t been a picnic for boomers, either. The boomers who lost their homes in the early 1980s when mortgage rates soared above 20% definitely knew hard times.
How Older People View the Young
And while boomers hate being stereotyped, they’re very quick to share their biases about young people. Here are some that I hear a lot:
They Don’t Want to Work
The new generations entering the workforce do have a different view of work than boomers did when they were young. They’re more likely to set boundaries and seek flexibility at work. Having seen many workers sacrifice their health and their families for their jobs only to be dumped in the next round of corporate reorganizations, I can’t help but think young people have got it right.
They Think They Know Everything
The new generation of workers are well-educated and aren’t shy about sharing their ideas. When they question why things are done a certain way, it’s part of their learning process.
They Could Get Ahead Financially if They Stopped Eating Avocado Toast and Drinking $10 Lattes
This is so ridiculous! Every generation has had its indulgences and luxuries. Boomers used to spend all their money at the bars on the weekends. There aren’t enough lattes and avocado toast in the world to solve the problem of soaring house prices and wages that haven’t kept pace.
They Don’t Know How to Communicate
It’s true that young people communicate differently and sometimes depend on technology when a face-to-face conversation might be more appropriate, but very few boomers always got it right when communicating with others.
Moving from “They” to “We”
A common thread through all of these statements is “Us” vs. “Them”, or “They” vs. “We” thinking. We’re seeing more and more studies showing that diversity of all kinds, including age diversity, can lead to better results. And that applies to all kinds of groups—workplaces, faith communities, clubs, volunteer organizations, and even educational institutions.
So how do we move from “They” to “We”? Here are a few ideas:
Seek Out Opportunities to Interact
A first step in overcoming intergenerational conflict is to bring people of different generations together. It could be a mentorship program, an Employee Resource Group, or volunteering with a community organization or at a seniors’ home.
Look at Things From Their Point of View
Instead of dismissing others as “snowflakes” or “fossils”, try to understand their worldview. Ask questions about their life experience…and listen to the answers. Then, look for common ground. You may find the generations aren’t all that different.
Recognize That You Can Learn From Each Other
Instead of automatically dismissing ideas because they’re different, be open to learning from others.
In his book From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life, Arthur C. Brooks points out that young people possess “fluid intelligence” giving them the ability to analyze, innovate and solve new problems without historical knowledge. Older people, on the other hand, have “crystallized intelligence”, giving them a greater ability to use their lived experience to synthesize and understand complex ideas. Put these two types of intelligence together and the results can be powerful.
Recognize Your Own Biases
Finally, be aware of your biases. If you catch yourself making some of the above assumptions, challenge yourself to shift your mindset from adversarial to collaborative.
It’s time to move beyond the labels and start listening to each other! Imagine what we could achieve in a world where we all worked together toward a common goal. That’s the kind of world I want to live in.
How do you foster intergenerational cooperation in your life? Drop me a comment below and let me know.
Learn more about me in my bio and on my personal blog at BoomerEcoCrusader.com. You can also find me on Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest.