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Want to feel safe? Yeah, same.

Hello all! How have you all been?

I have been a bit busy with my new cat, my first own cat. I got him last Sunday and we are now completing a week. It has been an emotional rollercoaster. I was very scared the first four-five days. I kept thinking ‘what if I do something wrong and harm this cat?’. Now I am getting used to being responsible for a pet, but this reaction of mine also got me thinking how the need for security and safety lies in the depths of our subconscious, whether it be for ourselves or for family or friends or pets.

A lot of our reactions can be traced back to this need. Our friend behaves a bit cold or different towards us and oftentimes, the first thought that comes to mind is ‘what did I do wrong?’ and if we take it further, ‘is he/she going to leave me?’. But we forget that that person might just be having a bad day. Or something unexpected happens and we immediately start thinking about the worst case scenario in the hopes that we prepare for it (which is what happened with my cat). This way, our minds can make sure that we are safe even if the worst happens.

However, constantly thinking about safety and making sure that things do not go wrong is a) very overwhelming, as there are many factors to consider and b) there are so many things that we cannot control that even trying to control anything seems to be an empty effort. Things happen the way they are supposed to anyway. We just end up mentally draining ourselves.

And I am guilty of this. One thing that helped me tremendously in the past year is learning to let go. In my case, I hope I learnt to leave things to God and this made me feel much safer because I was convinced that God is handling things anyway. This is in line with the notion of letting go, going with the flow etc. It is a process to learn this, for sure, but ultimately, the thought that our situations are being handled anyway makes us feel better because it gives us security without dismissing the need for security.

Given that, let’s discuss today how we can achieve this. If you have, share with us how you achieved it.

Betul

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