Tell The Truth To Yourself, Not To Me
(The image tells us that he’s a developer. But let’s assume he’s a writer.)
I’m going to ask you this one question: Is writing authentically your passion?
Understanding passion
Long ago, I was in doubt. Is writing actually my dream? Is it what I genuinely love and relish doing?
Or is it just something else? The fame, the money, the approval? Are these things luring me towards writing or is writing luring me towards writing?
What is it? Still a hidden truth.
Till now, I’ve come to the conclusion that I love writing. Even more than that, I love to express.
I like talking to people, interacting with them and sharing my thoughts. And writing seems to be a good medium for that.
And writing itself is an art that I enjoy. Playing and juggling around with words is fun! Only a true writer can understand the satisfaction he/she gets after writing a few words.
But I’ve seen many people writing just because of its peripheral benefits.
The topmost reason for people to write is appreciation and approval. It is present in the background of every writer. But here’s the important question…
Is it what drives us?
Having a simple desire of being read or acknowledged, according to me, is safe. But there’s a problem when you become dependent on it.
I had started to derive my sense of self-worth and confidence from it.
I realized this a few weeks ago. And again a few days ago. (I’m a constant realizing machine you see!)
Someone who read my posts on WordPress sent me an email about how my posts were proving to be useful.
“A personal mail.” It was a big deal for my ego. I liked the appreciation and felt worthy! I still remember that feeling of pride.
There’s no problem in acknowledging the appreciation. But when your sense of self-worth becomes dependent on it, that’s problematic.
A few days after that, I listened to Eckhart Tolle’s talk. A lady asked him, “Can you elaborate on healthy self-esteem vs. ego?”
He said, “Your ego wants external things to cling on and identify with. A house, or a car, and it derives its worth from them. Then, it also compares itself with others. ‘He’s got a graduate degree. Oh, I have 3 PhDs.’”
“On the other hand, self-esteem is something that derives its sense of worth and identity from the formless being within. When it knows what it truly is. It is not something outside. But the indestructible life force inside!”
Here lied my core error. I was identifying with my writing and the comments I was getting.
In reality, was I writing to write?
I again and again asked myself the same thing.
What am I doing this for? For money and followers or for my satisfaction? Am I deriving my worth from it or am I treating it like my dream work and passion?
Have I made myself over-dependent on it?
Because a passion frees you. It doesn’t bind you.
There’s no need to burden yourself with something you can’t do. There aren’t many real writers out there.
Don’t make art to make money. Make money to make more art.
– Jeff Goins
Why does the quality of many people’s writing decline in a flash after a viral article? Or why do they start playing safe?
‘Cause they are satisfied. Their aim was never to write. But to earn fame and money. Or perhaps, they gave it too much importance, more than needed.
So they’ve stopped. They’ve turned stagnant.
For real artists or writers, there’s no need to fear. Because there’s no actual competition.
In the end, the one with the long-term aim of “writing” is going to cross the finish line. And he/she will keep writing even after that.
Because writing was his/her aim and still is.
Conclusion
It is necessary to time and again examine yourself. That are you a writer? Is it de facto your passion? Or has a third party goal has set in?
And for the ones who really want to be writers, this question is more important: Am I still a writer? Have I deviated from my goal?
Money is important, but not more than the art.
Art is important, but not more than your interest.
Interests are important, but not more than you.
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You read the whole thing, awesome!
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